Thursday, August 20, 2009

Antidote for Discouragement

Okay. I'll admit it. Last week I was a little discouraged. Well, maybe more than a little. Things just weren't going my way. Or according my timeline. And I was tired of feeling like I had to hang on for an unspecified amount of time until God opened the door for us to move to France. I don't want to hang on anymore, I want to GO.

So I prayed, and journaled, and broke down and ate chocolate for the first time in over a month.

And I was still discouraged.

I talked to David, and discovered that he was discouraged, too. Unlike misery, discouragement does NOT love company.

So I was still discouraged.

We decided to get away--to take a breather, and we packed up the car are drove to the lake for the weekend. We had good food, great conversation with family, and lots of playtime.

And I was still discouraged.

I wish that I could tell you that I discovered the antidote for discouragement, but I didn't. I simply rode it out, clinging to Jesus. Eventually I surrendered MY way and MY timeline to Him and decided to trust HIS way and HIS timeline.

Note: I DECIDED to trust.

I don't want to trust Him (I want to do it my way!). I am not swept up in happy, trusting feelings. But really, what choice do I have? I can stay frustrated, angry and discouraged, or I can decide to trust in the fact that I have a loving God who promises to always work all things together for my good and His glory. And that is the truth.

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6

He will make my paths straight.

Straight.

Not SHORT. Not EASY. Not FAST.

Straight.

I may not know the cure for discouragement, but I think I may have discovered the cause. I get discouraged when I forget that God is more concerned with my journey than my destination. I get discouraged when I focus on the plans of God and forget about the person of God. I get discouraged when I am pursuing my goal, and lose sight of my Jesus. My Jesus, who is with me on my way.

The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Deut. 31:8

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